Is That Yellow Pages Directory In Your Drawer an Authentic Leader or an Arrogant Dullard?

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by andrewsho

Just got a survey call that was likely paid for by AT&T.  They were mostly asking questions about print directory usage with a couple of bones paid to online.  It seemed like the point of this survey was not so much about print directory usage, but more about people’s emotional attachment to their book.  We spent most of our time on the following question:

“If AT&T’s print yellow pages directory were a person how would you describe it?”

Here were the answers I was supposed to agree or disagree with:

  1. Confident
  2. Intelligent
  3. Sense of humor
  4. Impersonal
  5. Arrogant
  6. Dull
  7. Helpful
  8. Leader
  9. Unique
  10. Authentic
  11. Forward thinking
  12. Well informed
  13. Friendly
  14. Innovative
  15. Energetic

Besides the fact that my print directory is a misogynistic nihilist with a furry fetish and OCD, which is mainly why I keep it locked in a drawer, what struck me most were the questions they asked about my print yellow pages usage and my answers to them:

Q: How often do you use your print yellow pages?  A: Once every four months or less often

Q: How do you decide which print yellow pages to use? A: Whichever one came last

Granted I am a special case and I shouldn’t have lied about my work during the screening process (sorry AT&T!), but I am guessing the trend for print usage that comes out of this survey is going to be like after hours at a plushie convention (i.e. not pretty).


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